Sunday, December 31, 2023

Looking to the Past Gave Me the Way into the Future

When I was a child, my mother used to take me and my brothers shopping and every time we walked into a store, she stopped us, looked into our eyes to make sure she had our attention and gave us the same speech, “If you get lost, don’t wander around the store looking for me. Stop. Stay right where you are and I will come find you.” I did get lost a few times. I turned around and all of sudden she wasn’t there and I’d look around a little bit thinking she was just around the next corner and when I saw she wasn’t I would stop and wait for her. Admittedly I was anxious when I didn’t know where she was but under the anxiety and fear was the certain knowledge that she was looking for me and would find me if I just stayed where I was. And, of course, she always did. Even though it seemed like forever, I was never lost for more than a few minutes before she would find me, give me a hug, tell me to stay close and we were off again about our shopping trip.

This story has some very obvious connections to the Good Shepherd story found in Luke 15 but more importantly, it’s the memory God gave me that brought me to him. I’d given up on God as a child, floating between atheism and agnosticism. I’d been living with untreated depression for decades and surviving in an abusive relationship. I was trapped and suffocating in my life. I tried everything I could think of in my power to relieve some of pressure and pain and had given up, defeated and consigned to my fate. I remember desperately wanting God to be real because the only way I was going to find peace or joy in my life was if he was real and if he even cared.

One very late night/early morning I was sitting quietly writing in a journal when this 20-year-old obscure memory from a childhood I had blocked out came to me so vividly I could hear my mother’s voice say the words and I realized that for years I had been metaphorically wandering around looking for God instead of waiting for him to find me. That was the moment I surrendered to this God I didn’t know yet. I remember the prayer: “God, I’ve tried everything I can to fix my life and there’s nothing left for me to try. You are my only hope so I’m going to sit right here and wait for you to find me.” I didn’t realize then the floodgate of power and grace God released into my life and it would be years before he revealed his grace in Jesus Christ to me.

For several years before the pandemic, I’d been living in a stagnant period of my faith journey, feeling like my faith and my relationship with God had dried up—like a couple sitting at the breakfast table with nothing to say to each other anymore and barely acknowledging each other’s existence. Occasionally, I tried to liven things up, to reignite the fire of the relationship, to grab hold of the intimacy I shared with God in the early years of my faith. But I quickly drifted back to my almost non-existent relationship status with God. Then 2020 came and my life has been about surviving one crisis after another: the virus, a depressive episode, my father’s sudden death and assuming the care of mother, suffering with constant vertigo for 5 months and the subsequent 3 months of therapy to correct it, the sudden loss of the job and ministry I had enjoyed for almost 20 years and had planned to retire from and most recently the rapid decline of my mother's health and having to put her into hospice care.

 Even though it's been hard, I’m grateful for the last three years because it put me in a very familiar place and recently the memory of my mother’s speech came back to me helping me to realize that once again, I’ve been roaming around trying to find God when I should just be staying where I am and waiting for him to find me—waiting and watching, with unwavering faith that he will find me. Immediately, I prayed a similar prayer of surrender and have already begun to feel some small stirring in my soul and a faint sensing of his presence again. Christmas is the celebration of Immanuel (God with us) so this realization is timely and with the hope of renewal as the new year approaches, I am looking forward to what God has in store for me in 2024 because whatever it is, I know it will bring me closer to him and that is exactly where I truly want to be.

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